修了很多次，這是我最後的定稿，希望大家給點意見。
這次我一樣分段，原文放在前面，後面是我的翻譯。
Giving advice, especially when I am in no position to give it and hardly know
what I am talking about. I manage my own affairs with as much care and steady
attention and skill as – let us say – a drunken Irish tenor.
我專門在沒有立場或不知所云時，給別人意見。我處理自身的事務，就像喝得爛醉的愛爾
蘭男高音一樣，看似小心謹慎、沉著專注且手法幹練，但卻左支右絀。(*註1)
*註1 drunken Irish tenor: A drunken singer is not in control of himself.
Priestley is suggesting that he manages his own affairs badly.
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I swing violently from enthusiasm to disgust. I change policies as a woman
changes hats. I am here today and gone tomorrow. When I am doing one job, I
wish I were doing another. I base my judgments on anything – or nothing.
我一下熱情洋溢，一下又憤恨不平，搖擺不定：改變想法就像女人換鞋子一樣快；今天還
在這裡，明日已然離去；工作的同時，心裡卻想著另一個；我的判斷立基於一切事物，也
可能毫無根據。
______________________________________________________________________________
I have never the least notion what I shall be doing or where I shall be in
six months time. Instead of holding one thing steadily, I try to juggle with
six. I cannot plan, and if I could I would never stick to the plan. I am a
pessimist in the morning and an optimist at night, am defeated on Tuesday and
insufferably victorious by Friday.
我從沒想過六個月後我該做什麼或我會在哪。我試著兼顧六件事，而不是穩當處理一件。
我不會計畫，就算會，我也從不照計畫走。早上，我是個悲觀者，晚上，我是個樂觀者。
星期二，我垂頭喪氣，到星期五前，我又春風得意。
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But because I am heavy, have a deep voice and smoke a pipe, few people
realize that I am a flibbertigibbet on a weathercock. So my advice is asked.
And then ten minutes or so, I can make Polonius look a trifler. I settle deep
in my chair, two hundred pounds of portentousness, and with some first-rate
character touches in the voice and business with pipe, I begin:
"Well, I must say that in your place -” And inside I am bubbling with delight.
但因為我長得很胖，有個低沉的聲音又叼根煙斗，幾乎沒有人意識到我是隻風向雞。所以
別人常來諮詢我的意見。過了十分鐘左右，我可以把波洛尼厄斯(*註2)這個善於提供建議
的角色，變成一個無足輕重的人。我兩百磅的體重，穩當當的坐在椅子上，叼根煙斗，帶
點上流性格的語調提供中肯的建議(*註3)，告訴他：「嗯，站在你的立場，我必須說
……」
*註2 Polonius: a character in SHakespeare's Hamlet, noted for giving advice.
*註3 two hundred pounds of portentous...: In other words, a large man(two
hundred pounds) using an impressive voice and using impressive gestures
with his pipe(some first-grade character touches) gives
grave(portentous) advice.
This is a humorous description of the author's prose.
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